This week was way more productive than last week. It is officially crunch time because next week is already mid-terms. “Just like that” we have already sped through 3 complete weeks of class and are half-way through our 4th week. I spent at least two of those weeks feeling overwhelmed, panicked, discouraged, and struggling. I think those mental barriers paralyzed me a little and interfered with my learning. I still get anxiety when I am with big groups of people and even more so in class. One of my biggest insecurities is feeling illegitimate or like I don’t belong there. Many of the students in my class have been interested in computers for years and their passion and enthusiasm radiates in class.
I have progressed a lot in a short amount of time, but I am worried that it isn’t enough. My reading comprehension is not up to speed and it takes me a long time to understand what I am reading. Also, it has always been challenging for me to understand technical things and technology. I keep on wondering “What have I gotten myself into?”
I have definitely identified all of the barriers to my learning and the reasons why I wouldn’t make and now I think it is time for me to focus on how I am going to make it in this class. Fear is paralyzing and procrastination is deeply detrimental.
It is the half-way point and I am determined to turn things around. I have had a lot happen in the past month so I am going to forgive myself for “slacking” and just get to work. At the very least, if I give it my best I will be much better off than before I started.
There were good things that happened this week…
Did I mention that I payed off my bills and so my credit has already improved? That is a victory for me because I have always struggled to pay my bills. Also, I started cleaning up my eating and working out!!! I really enjoy the convenience of working out at home! It is a huge time saver and I feel less self-conscious.
In the midst of my procrastination and paralysis last week, I started blogging like crazy and it helped me keep my sanity. I just want to thank every single one of you for being so supportive, encouraging, and taking time out of your day to visit me. It really means the world to me <3.
Today was my 2nd day without coffee and I made it. I haven’t given up caffeine completely because I still drink tea. I have started cutting down on animal products and it is my 2nd day of cutting out sugar completely. This is a first for me. It was always too challenging for me to give up the sweets. I guess it is true that anything is possible when the time is right.
So even though I have been struggling academically, I have still managed to improve other aspects of my life!
Examine true rules
Stimulate the mind in new ways
I have managed to do almost all three of these except meditation. I probably could benefit from some quiet time. I will add it to my list of things to do.
Another thing that has been on my mind is:
What kind of project should I do in 2017?
So far I have done two “Happiness Projects” both were somewhat incomplete. This was my first year of doing a “Transform Your Life Project” and this time around I have been sticking with it! Maybe I will do another “Transform Your Life Project.”
What kind of project do YOU think I should do next year? Comment below to share your ideas. And I would like to invite you to join me! We could check in with each other and offer support and accountability!
On that note, I better get back to studying. Sweet dreams and I look forward to hearing your ideas!
Love, Joy, and Blessings Always,