Throughout this week I woke up in the middle of the night because my right hand was painfully numb.
I think I must have slept on it wrong…
In the middle of the day while I was playing Starcraft my hand went numb again and it was hard to wake it up.
I relied on too many peppermint mochas to keep me awake throughout the day.
And I whipped up some sugar cookie dough for a cookie-making party that never happened.
In the meantime I made mug sugar cookies and topped them with peppermint ice cream. I tossed in some chocolate chips which were delish. And my muggy sugar cookies inspired me to make chocolate chip sprinkle pancakes this morning.
My clothes don’t quite hang right. I am lethargic and dragging.
So much to do, but so little energy.
I no longer have the pressure to look or be a certain way in my relationship like I did in the past.
It has been hard for me to turn away anything yummy and my cravings have been stronger than ever.
I am at least 30 pounds heavier than I was a year ago and 20 pounds more than I was this summer. I think those midnight munchy runs might be to blame.
My lack of activity has been remarkably lame.
I have recognized a few faces when I’ve been out and about, but instead of saying hello; I walk the other way and hideout.
Somewhat ashamed that I am not in the space that I would like to be.
My life is full of blessings and I have all the love and support that I need. Everyone’s support but my own.
I hate to admit that rockbottom I’ve hit… Or at least my heaviest weight.
There are big changes to make on the horizon for me.
Right now I am IN THIS SPACE, but before long I will be heading to a BETTER place.